- Wig or make your hair big and use curlers or something. Call friends and try to borrow a wig.
- Trench coat
- Big sunglasses
With these 3 things that you most likely already have you can transform yourself into the wife of a man who has been coming home late from the office for weeks now! So, you go incognito and follow him from the office to a fancy restaurant - he's cheating! You just know it. You sit at the bar and very obviously read the paper as if to say, "Nothing to see here, folks. I'm just a woman in a wig wearing sunglasses inside a la lots of 80's movies and I'm just reading the paper. Pretty soon I'm going to smoke a cigarette and start coughing because I don't actually smoke but it only draws more attention to the fact that I'm just another bar patron on a regular night who keeps peering at the man at the table for two just over the top of the paper that I can't stop reading." And then she shows up and they kiss each other on the cheek (he's never that European when he's with you!) and then she hands him a case and he looks in, nods approvingly and then gives her a hug and starts whispering in her ear - CAUGHT IN THE ACT! You can't stand it anymore so you interfere and make a scene, slap him, slap her and slap him again. Call him a cheater and start crying - you can't control your emotions. He grabs you by both your wrists and calms you down by shhhhing you like a baby. He's not cheating. He's taken another job so he could afford to buy you A NEW DIAMOND NECKLACE!!!! So silly...
Okay, so I don't have an elaborate story for all of these but they are still easy breezy beautiful cover girl.
The Substitute Teacher:
- Homemade spit balls
- Homemade "kick me" sign
- Sweatshirt to stuff in your butt to make it all kinds of big
- Socks to stuff your bra but you have to make them droopy and just below your waistline
You are the kid-tortured Ms. Whatever - the single cat lady who kinda resembles Mrs. Peacock from Clue.
Boys - Joe the Plumber is popular this year. Deal with it.
Any other ideas??? I'm going as Bernie from Weekend At Bernie's. I'm a dead guy. The man-wig was expensive but everything else is from the thrift store!